‘Touch Me There’ is, simply put, Ruby Gill’s “most special creation”, marking the moment she came out to herself, finally silencing “the devil that sits on my shoulder, who tries to convince me that I am an angel”. Written on a riverbank with the intention of nobody ever hearing it, Gill’s vocals float along a quietly rambling guitar in a piercing self-examination of the things that had been holding her back from experiencing the kind of intimacy she wanted, building towards the freeing admission that “I haven’t been kissing the people I want to”, echoed by a backing vocal choir of her treasured found family: Annie-Rose Maloney, Hannah McKittrick, Angie McMahon, Hannah Cameron, Jess Ellwood and Olivia Hally (Oh Pep!). Its empowering music video, directed by Bridgette Winten (Maple Glider, Angie McMahon, Winten) and shot on analog film at Naarm’s iconic queer workout and community space Pony Club Gym, echoes the song’s sense of physical and emotional intimacy and strength in queer identity, featuring a cast of lesbian, female, trans and non-binary people working out in order “to celebrate the bodies we’re in and the resistance it is to be queer – we wanted [the video] to feel sexy, but also make you cry. That is my favourite type of intimacy”

Of the song, Ruby Gill says, “During the longest dry spell of my life, I came out to myself. The first time I said it out loud was in this song – all that sitting by a river waiting for the truth to come out led to me being honest for the first time about who I was attracted to and what kind of sex I wanted in my life. It took almost two years of zero kissing to get to that point of self-knowledge. Not intentionally, haha – everything just felt so wrong and scary after being touched in really unsafe ways before that. I was numb for years, but I finally felt sensation in my body again after writing Touch Me There. It broke me open. I hope it breaks other people open too, whether it’s about queerness or otherwise. You have a say over your love and pleasure”.

Some Kind of Control:

1. Under The Flying Foxes On The Last Night Of Summer
2. Space Love
3. Some Kind Of Control
4. How Chimpanzees Reassure Each Other
5. Touch Me There
6. To What Do I Owe My Pleasure
7. Room Full Of Human Male Politicians
8. Throw Your Lucky Coins On Me
9. The Flood
10. Emmagen Creek

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Earmarking a new chapter of self-acceptance and musical rawness for the acclaimed artist, ‘Some Kind Of Control’ reflects an assuredness and an unflinching honesty that can only come with time, and a dedication to going to the end of every feeling. It was inspired by the all new freedom and day-to-day power Ruby Gill suddenly had during Naarm/Melbourne’s extensive lockdown while simultaneously, like so many others, wrestling with an absolute lack of control over the circumstances – a duality she hadn’t experienced before. Ruby Gill shares, “I had been grappling with what it meant to have all and no control over my time and body – all at once. In a big way, the world was in charge, but also in a day-to-day way, I had all the power: I could move freely through my kitchen and clothes and kindness however I wished – it was a new experience for me after feeling quite trapped in some difficult spaces and systems for a long time – “always babysitting other people’s arguments instead of my own” as the lyrics say. I feel like this song encompasses so much of what I’ve learnt and reclaimed in the past few years, and feels very reflective musically of my true, silly, powerful self and community.”

Sonically mirroring the lilting inner turmoil of the song’s lyrics, almost as if fighting with itself, ‘Some Kind of Control’ was recorded with trusted collaborator Tim Harvey (Ella Hooper, Jade Imagine), and features tightly reigned-in production and suitably tense instrumentation courtesy of Ruby Gill’s spanning electric guitar, Jess Ellwood on drums and Lewis Coleman on bass, and a heavenly backing vocal choir featuring Annie-Rose Maloney, Hannah McKittrick, Angie McMahon, and Olivia Hally (Oh Pep!). Its music video, directed by Bridgette Winten (Maple Glider, Angie McMahon, Winten), showcases freeing and free-flowing vignettes that were filmed on real black and white film.

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‘I Forgot To Be Profound Today’ follows on from previous singles ‘Champion Ruby’, a song about Ruby’s unhealthy attraction to people who smoke cigarettes, and ’Public Panic Attacks’, which brims with the self-deprecating humour that is quickly becoming Ruby’s trademark. The Joburg-born artist calls the minimal, piano-led single her “small act of defiance against a job that makes me tired and a world that I never feel truly interesting enough for,” and it comes as the perfect introduction to an album laced with critique and catharsis against the corporation, Australia’s border security policies and a more general exploration of loss, birds and learning to breathe.

Ruby continues: “I have always (and I think a lot of us always) harboured a lot of internal pressure to be externally ‘interesting’ and to perform to a level that pleases capitalist ideals of what a functional, successful, worthy adult might look and behave like,” says Ruby. “But we cannot sing on key all day. There is too much joy and anger to exist within. I want to be a real human being again.”

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